Check out this amazing, heartfelt post from Dawn Embers.

Something akin to reality has sunk in. Or is starting to, or something. It only took it a week and a half. I really expected it to hit much sooner, but I’ve managed to hold it off with delusion for 10 days now. Not bad, if you ask me. With heavy doses of reality – for me anyway – comes insomnia. Yup, I am sleep deprived this morning. Tee hee ^_^

One of my characters, Zach, makes all of his important decisions after long nights of contemplation and no sleep. He manages to achieve some level of clarity through these moments that he just can’t at any other time. The important thing to keep in mind is that each of these decisions would be considered insane and foolish by a sane, not-sleepy person, but all of them have served as important and successful milestones in his professional and personal lives.

I would like to think I have the same luck. This is where the ‘fantasy’ comes in. If you’re here looking for my ramblings about a vast and sweeping genre, I do apologize. I should have warned you up front that this isn’t about that.

It’s about personal fantasy. No, not that, either. I mean, it could be, but I’m not interested in upping my blog rating to sate a couple of dirty minds.

The kind of fantasy that keeps us moving from day to day. That motivates us to buy lottery tickets even though the odds are…well…high. The kind of fantasy that makes us apply for the job that pays double our current salary even though we know our qualifications don’t meet the requirements. The kind that lets us swoon when we see pictures/videos/interviews with our favorite celebrity. (Though that starts to delve into the ‘that‘ kind, and we’re not talking about that. Minds up here, people).

I have one of those fantasies, and it’s a simple one. Sort of. That someone will pay me enough money for one of my ideas (writing or business) that I can do it for a living. Last night we were watching Clerks II. It’s a simple movie on the surface, but the ending is, to me, touching and moving.

And it made me start thinking “I want that to happen to me. Sort of. But on my terms.” Which was exaggerated by the fact that yesterday I was talking to a friend about our two different business ideas. You know the fantasy of “I’d start my own business if I only…”

For me, it’s “If I only had 50k just laying around.” And the fantasy last night after the movie was how I would create something brilliant and viral that would make people want to pledge small amounts of money to me because they loved me so much they wanted to see me start this business. $10 each from 5000 people. Super easy, right? If I knew 5000 people.

Anyway…turns out my brilliant business decisions made at six am after no sleep the night before are not Zach’s. Dude could sell a vintage, one-of-a-kind Captain Kirk replica to a hard core Star Wars fan and make bank. I wish I had his brilliance. Or his something…I don’t wish I had his ability to sell. That would make it even harder to sleep at night. Not that he does anything illegal, but I’m pretty sure his tactics push the boundaries of ethical sometimes.

Which is why I wouldn’t really live in the fantasy world that my characters populate in my head. But sometimes, it sure is nice to dream and lose myself in the more pleasant aspects of it.

What kind of fantasies do you entertain that help you keep up your spirits? Winning the lottery? Landing that seven figure book contract? Winning a spot on one of those TV shows that makes your home over for free and makes it gorgeous and stainless steel filled? Something else?