I started building the basic blocks in my head and on paper yesterday for my new idea. I might do something a little different this time. I have four characters and I can’t decide who’s ‘main’. A similar problem I have in gaming. I also can’t decide whose conflict is the most/least interesting, but I know at they all feed each other toward drama and eventual resolution. So I’m telling myself I can keep all right now.

In the process of doing this, I started to delve into each character, which means for me making notes. And the notes started out with ‘Male #1 does this. Male #2 doesn’t like it. Female #2 thinks it’s funny.’

And while the notes amused me, I realized very quickly I should give them names. So I stared at a site full of baby names for the next hour or two. With thoughts like “I need this girl to have a fairly nuetral, tomboyish name because she’s all pretty and elegant” and “wouldn’t it be funny if this person had the same initials for their first and last name?”

Which is why I should never be allowed to name a child. You think I only do this with my characters? Real conversations at home: “If we have a girl, we should name her Alexandria. Because what else do you name a child whose destined to rule the world by their mid-twenties? We should make sure she knows that, too.”

Fortunately for said imaginary child, I wouldn’t do the other things I do to my characters. Like “Okay, so his dad is rich but xenophobic and still lives in the past that was an amazing high school football career. What could make his life worse?” or “So she’s a little insecure about her weight, but a great kid otherwise. Could I possibly get her addicted to over-the-counter meds?”

Because honestly, if we treated our characters as well as we treat our kids, no one would read our books. Who wants to read about well-adjusted individuals who stand no chance of being on Springer for the right price?

What do you put your characters through that you’d never dream of doing to a real person?